Pope to Institute New Rite for Stripping the Altar on Holy Thursday

Pope Francis is generally thought to be not very interested in the fine points of liturgy, so it came as something of a surprise when during his visit to America he announced, and demonstrated for the American bishops, a new rite of stripping the altar on Holy Thursday.

Liturgical progressives hailed the innovation because… well… progressives like innovation. Fr. Anchovy Roughy of Our Lady of Bauhaus Abbey stated, “First washing the feet of Muslim women and now this? We’re going to have the best Holy Thursday ever this year!” Traditionalist liturgists were not so sure. When asked about the reform, Dom Cash Folsom-Prison of the Oratory of Our Lady of the Bearded Fiddleback squirmed uncomfortably and noted, “While we appreciate the effort to recover the prominence of the stripping of the altar, which was lost in the abomination of desolation that were the reforms of Vatican II, and while we reaffirm our affection for and obedience to the See of Peter, we find ourselves asking, ‘what the @#$%& was he thinking?'”

Asked about the forthcoming revision, Pope Francis said, “Meh. It seemed like a good idea at the time.”


  1. I am literally confused. I know the article was funny. But, what was the real context behind the video?

  2. [Wet blanket alert:] While I did enjoy the satire (and curious how the video managed to pull that off [no pun intended]), was it really necessary to use a name so close to an actual person’s, whatever the opinion on his views?

  3. Well, if one is attempting satire it’s pretty standard. And both names are parodies, so no one view was being singled out.

  4. The video was hilarious. Does this mean that clever videographers can make things that are ludicrous look real?

      1. @Fr. Ron Krisman:
        They edited out the part where he took a seat to avoid fainting after noticing what happened. His expression when seated was something like “Whatever kind of man is this? Even the cross and candles stay put.”

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